I always considered myself a disciplined person. And lately that self-discipline has left me. I’ve literally spent the last 3 months telling myself every week (and sometimes mid-week) that this next week was when I was going to start getting up early in the mornings and doing my walk for exercise. A 40 minute brisk walk around my neighborhood. I have absolutely no reason to not do it other than pure laziness. I need to do it. I know I need to do it. But somehow, at 5:30 a.m., I can talk myself out of having to start today. Yeah, I can just start tomorrow, I say to myself. That’ll still leave me X months (now down to X days) until I have to go on my mission trip and actually be physically active for 5 straight days, all day long.

I’ve also completely blown my personal discipline of reading the Bible every morning. For years I did it. And I know how a big impact it has on my life. It improves my attitude on a daily basis. It also helps me keep my priorities in line. It reminds me that the world is really watching me to see if I have that deep-seated happiness that Christians supposedly have.

I can’t go back and redo the past days where I didn’t start back on my old routine. But I can try again to restart it. Maybe by writing about it and knowing others know about it will help.

Nah, probably not. That snooze button is just too easy to hit.

Just had one of the greatest afternoons I’ve had in quite some time. I went to the the pub I mentioned in a past post. Some friends of mine were there – well, friends and friends of friends. Not only did I have a couple of good beers and hang out with some friends, but I also got to play Monopoly! Yes, I won ultimately, but that wasn’t it. For most of the game I was way behind and pretty much classified myself as out, and was having a good time anyway. Great afternoon.

Then I come home, and my wife whips up a selection of snack food type stuff – hummus, pita bread, tortilla chips, salsa, grapes, and store-bought brownies. We retreated to the patio and snacked for dinner. Was outstanding.

Right now, life is good. Tuesday, back to work.

So in an earlier post I mentioned buying tickets for an awesome tour that will be hitting my city this fall. The tour is the Music Builds tour. The show will be awesome.

Like all the bands seem to be doing these days, there is a presale that requires a password to get in. But the password is published everywhere, so of what real value is it to call it a presale, etc? On this show, however, they added a pre-presale for members of the band’s fan clubs. That got me to join the Third Day fanclub. Just so I could get tickets where I wanted in advance of the presale (which is in advance of the regular sale. Whatever).

Anyway, as part of doing the pre-presale, they promised a 4 song download – one song from each band. I went poking around last night trying to find my download link. I looked at the fan club website, the ticket seller’s website (musictoday.com – no link because their “service charges” are too high), and searched the email they sent me when I purchased. I couldn’t find anything about it. So I emailed the support address at musictoday and asked about it. They sent me the following response:

The 4 free digital downloads will be sent to your email address in the following weeks.

Is that really a download if they send them to me in the “following weeks”?

I think if other things in my life weren’t frustrating me so much right now, this probably wouldn’t bother me at all. But right now it really bugs me.

This morning, on another blog I read (sorry, can’t link to it – it’s private and you couldn’t get in anyway), this person was venting about how they want to do more things and yet feel totally stifled. And they even love their job. At the end was this person’s prayer for today. I think I’ll print it out and put it somewhere in my car so I see it and say it every day on the way to work. It went a little something like this:

Lord, help me be content with who I am and what I’m doing…but most importantly…with what You’re doing with me right where I am. Whew, and Amen.

I really don’t think it’s coincidence that I read that blog this morning. I happened to open up the laptop before going to work (which I’m trying not to do these days as it just delays my departure) and noticed in my feed reader a new post on this blog. Went to read it, and ta-da, found that prayer. Exactly what I needed to see today as I sat here contemplating calling in sick and trying to justify it in my head as I’m not actually sick.

Wait, I need to say it again:

Lord, help me be content with who I am and what I’m doing…but most importantly…with what You’re doing with me right where I am. Whew, and Amen.

Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s off to work I go……….

I made a HUGE mistake yesterday. Well, a mistake in one sense, but not in another. You see, I took a vacation day yesterday. Yes, on a Tuesday. Some friends who I hadn’t seen in a couple years were in town, and yesterday was the only day we could all get together. So I took a vacation day and spent the day with them. By mid-afternoon we all went our separate ways. But it was great seeing them and catching up with them.

So what was the mistake? Taking a day off in the middle of the week. Not because there was tons of work waiting for me, but because it just solidified how much I hate my current job. Weekends, even with a day added for vacation or holiday aren’t as bad. Maybe it’s the multiple days off that ease the pain. You know, absence makes the heart grow fonder. Or takes the edge off. Or something.

But taking a day off in the middle of the week makes it worse, by far. Leaving Monday after spending the day thinking about how much I hated my job, to have a GREAT day off seeing old friends, then back at the hated job. A recipe for bad attitude.

I love the people I work with. And the job isn’t that miserable. Probably lots of people would love to have it. But at this point I am BORED! Same old thing. Not challenged anymore. Not learning anything new. If I’m not learning new stuff, or at least somewhat challenged, I get bored. Then I get frustrated. So that’s definitely this situation. Frustration.

I need to find a new JOB. But I have some benefits to my current situation that I don’t want to lose. Like a fairly flexible schedule. Decent manager. Good coworkers. Etc. So I’ve started putting the word out to friends in the business, especially that have worked with me and know my skills, that I’m interested in looking around. Hopefully that’ll work out.

It’s ae i gorgeous afternoon at the pub. My favorite pub that I mentioned in the post below. ‘m sitting on the upstairs deck, enjoying a fine Haufbrau Maibock. Sitting at a table under a tree so I have “scattered sunlight”. It’s about 70 degrees outside. Beautiful.

I absolutely love days like this. Sunshine, cool breeze, a good beer, a deck. These days are too few and far between.

Ooops, look at that. Time to head down to the bar for another beer. What will it be this time?

Update: It’s Boulevard Irish Ale this time. Hadn’t had it before. A friend of mine, who’s taste in beer I trust, likes it. After a couple of sips, it’s so-so, but maybe it’ll grow on me. We shall see.

As I sit up here on the upstairs deck, I hear laughter below. A group of four guys are on the downstairs back deck. All I can hear is the background sound of conversation, then occasionally all 4 of them will break out in laughter. A cacophony of laughter. I don’t know which one of them is the funny one, or if all 4 of them are. Can’t see them from here.
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Laughter. One of the things I really like to hear from other people. And one of the things I try to elicit from people I’m hanging out with. They usually laugh. Hopefully it’s usually with me and not at me. Maybe one day I’ll know for sure.

I love that Third Day, one of my favorite bands ever, is going on tour this fall and coming to my city. The last couple of tours have missed us. I love that the show will be them, and Switch Foot, and Jars of Clay. I love that they are partnering and sharing proceeds with Habitat for Humanity. I love that there is a presale for fan club members only today, and the public presale isn’t until next week. I love that my beautiful bride likes these bands too and will go to this show with me.

I love that feeling when I’m sitting on the outdoor patio at (one of) my favorite pubs around 6:00 p.m. or so. I love that the same waitress sees me coming and starts the Guinness pour for me before I even order, because she knows what I want. I love that 3 or 4 other people at the bar in the main room smile and wave, or say hello, because they’ve seen me here before and they recognize me. I love that I can take a book, sit and read, and not be disturbed until the glass is empty because that waitress I mentioned knows she doesn’t have to check on me. I love that if I don’t bring a book, there are other regulars there to chat with. I love that pub.

(inspired by the writing prompt at First 50 Words)